You might think looking at the bigger picture will help. It won’t.
You will meet the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with this week. No, wait. That’s the horoscope for Cancer. You’ll be all alone.
Beware. His favourite movie is Pyaar Ka Punchnama 2.
Sometimes a little serial killing is the answer to your life problems.
There’s no good time to tell your partner your true belief about Abhishek Bachchan’s Drona.
Getting an expensive pet is not a solution to your empty and meaningless existence, but it is a solution to distracting people from your empty and meaningless existence.
This week will put your theory of ‘If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it’ to test but the results won’t necessarily be to your liking.
Your intense knowledge of Urmila Matondkar’s filmography will come unexpectably handy this week.
Wow. How exhausting is it to live with perpetual diarrhoea of the explosive kind? Yes, it was a rhetorical question.
Don’t wear purple this week. It has nothing to do with any celestial arrangement, purple makes you look like something an eggplant threw up.
The stars passed on telling your horoscope this week.
So even Jackie Bhagnani is doing things. What’s your excuse?
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